Recently I've been feeling like something inside me is burning, like I'll catch fire if I'm not careful. Like I need to let it all out. Consume it in any and every way possible. Getting more makes me want more. I want to quench it's thirst, with sex, orgasms, eating, reading, pictures, video, cock, cum... It's insatiable.
I don't want it to stop. I'm loving every minute of it. Every single one of my senses seems to be heightened. Tuned to every minor detail. Every touch, makes hairs stand on end, every thought makes blood run faster. Savoring the sour-sweet taste of strawberries, wine, ice-cream and rich spiced curries for dinner, filling my head with aromas to make it whirl.
I can't get enough.
I want more.
I have been thinking about a film I saw years ago. I have no idea what it was called, I think it was foreign but honestly I don't remember much. If anyone knows the name, please let me know. I remember the plot or part of the plot. It was about a young woman who was so passionate, so sexually aroused that she felt like she was burning. She couldn't quench her desire in any way. She was confused and couldn't understand what it was, she would binge on rich foods and fruit to try to calm the sensation.
Her desire eventually forced her to walk out into the night, remove her nightgown and make love to a random stranger, a hunter in the forest.
It ends with her falling in love with a young man. While the two of them make love in the barn the fire ignites within her and both she and the barn catch fire. Like a match on a haystack.
This is exactly how I feel.
I've had this same feeling. I think it was my soul crying out, begging me to get rid of everything in my life that was inhibiting my happiness, creativity and growth. Whenever I start slipping into old habits, the feeling comes back. Tantra teaches you to live authentically and find the sensuality in everyday life. To really enjoy those strawberries you talked about. It's not just about sex, it's about living your truth. I've been studying and attempting to practice this for a few years now. I still have quite a ways to go, but it has helped me tremendously.
ReplyDeleteI've never seen that movie, but that does not sound like a happy ending at all. Being on fire is on my top five list of things I never want to happen to me.
I really enjoyed this post, Cande. Love the image too!
Hot hot hot! Please, come back to America and warm us all up. ;) good stuff
ReplyDeleteCharlie: That is definitely something I'll have to think about and research. It kinda hit home when I read what you wrote. Thanks for the compliments, the pic is not mine, I do like it and I think it fits the context. I stole it randomly from another website. I should probably avoid doing that.
ReplyDeleteDewey: Thanks hon, when I'm in the area I'll let you know so that I can "light your fire" lol.
Wow, that is intense. But I completely understand.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to skip the burning building part though.;)
Yeah The burning up at the end of the movie is something I'm not sure of myself. Although I could interpret it in two ways: one was that she had some form of release and higher awareness, and the other is that there was no other option but for her to explode into flames and die. I'm not sure...
ReplyDelete