Made for Me.

Have you ever gotten off to a video of yourself getting off? 

Rob broke his wrist about a month ago. (Wow time flies. I had barely realised it's been that long.) A broken wrist means that he has a lot of time to spare. He's likely been a little down and out, hard to get much of anything done with your right hand in a cast, I'd personally go nuts. Not being able to do any craft or drawing or playing of instruments or even typing properly.

Anyhow I sent him a song that he made on my phone while we were together last. It was a rainy day and we spent the evening playing with Garage Band on my iPhone. He created a couple simple songs that took him forever. I helped him figure out the program a little.
Fast forward to the other day, I was in Garage Band playing around and I realised his songs were still there so I sent him one.

He promptly downloaded it and proceeded to make a great song, something that was way beyond what I'd have expected for his second try on the app. It was very trip hop cool. Just a great Massive Attack style song.

The next day, as I'm finishing up at work, I receive an email with another song. There's a warning that says explicit lyrics and I figure, maybe he's inserted some rap fragments into the song. I get to the car, turn my bluetooth on and decide I want to hear the song on a "real" stereo. Next thing I know I'm blushing, laughing and hiding my face in my hands. I was alone, but the song caught me so off guard that I couldn't help myself. It was a song, with a sort of slow techno beat, layered on top is my voice. It's an audio clip I sent him of me talking while I get myself off. I'm saying all sorts of random stuff that comes to mind, dirty, dirty slutty stuff I want him to do to me. He remixed it, added effects and basically had my voice layered and repeating. It was insane. Not only was I flushed with embarrassment from hearing my own voice, (something that I generally don't like hearing) but I was turned on. It was strange how my own voice could possibly turn me on.

Then there's the fact that he even thought of doing this in the first place. It just made me want him in front of me so I could fuck him right then and there.

He sent me another email, another version of the same audio clip with a different background music, just as good, this time with a funkier beat, not as slow, a little more porn movie style yet tasteful. Next thing I know he's asking me if he could use images and clips of me to make a little movie.

Bring it on. Of course.

Today after some fiddling with Dropbox he sent me the video. First time watching, my reaction was similar to my reaction to the song, embarrassment, flushing red, my hand over my mouth, laughing and not quite believing my eyes. He'd rummaged through old emails and found a bunch of old pics and clips of me getting myself off. He artfully blended them together in a seamless clip set to his background music of me whispering what I want him to do to me.

I was in the middle of having lunch the first time I watched it but as soon as I finished I moved to the couch to watch it again, and again and again. 4 times got me off hard. Admittedly it's strange getting off to scenes of yourself and your own voice. I've done it before, gotten off to basic simple clips of myself, but when it's remixed and essentially made by someone else there's something unique about that experience. It's a sort of melding of two brains.

Despite the horny, slutty effects of the video, I couldn't help get teary with happiness when I first watched the video. The titles and hidden gems in the video just made it that much better. It is by far the sweetest, most thoughtful thing anyone has ever made for me. Sure it's naughty and slutty but it was made just for me.