Summer heat

Well it has been a while, and it's hot here so here's some of my summer heat. 

Surfacing Consciousness

There are days when I have words that surface in my head. They float into consciousness uninvited and are often just beginnings of sentences. They don't generally hold any real meaning but they keep coming back like I need to write them down. Problem is I don't know where the sentences are headed so I can't really go through with writing them. 

So here I am wanting to write and wanting to be eloquent with words with basically nothing to say. 

I wonder what it is that provokes the unfinished sentences to blossom in my brain like that; Situations, feelings, events, combinations, I'm sure, or just my subconscious trying to tell me something. But what?

It can be frustrating. But it's also a kind of innocent bliss, like I'm floating, daydreaming with nothing really solid to grasp. 

Generally I let them come and go but sometimes I force them, like today. Sometimes I make them into whatever I want, erotica, love letters, poems, lyrics, or random blog posts. 

Planting Seeds for October

"You go have a shower and surprise me when you get out" he said. I climb out of the shower and slip on a pair of thigh high black and grey striped socks, black short shorts with pink trim and a black bra, I pull my hair into a high top knot and slip my glasses on... I don't really need them, especially for sex, I just want the look. The nerdy or teacher-esque woman ready to get her mouth jammed full of cock.

My initial fantasy for the first moments of our meeting in October was to kneel directly in front of him on the floor and just shove his cock as soon as I could but instead he described another situation which has me so wet I keep slipping back to it.
He kisses his way down my body, down my belly, over to my thighs, reaching my pussy and licking me to orgasm, his tongue circling my clit and fingers pulling at my g-spot. I can picture my hands on his head, running my fingers through his hair,  pulling him in deeper, grinding against his face.

His descriptions over Skype the other night were half whispered into my headphones. I've described this feeling before. It's like having him inside my head, inside my fantasies, dictating what to do, what will happen. The thoughts and images are planted (like in the movie Inception) and I can't get them out, they grow and evolve. I can cum for days thinking back on those words. That night, 5 over a long while, a couple hours I'd say. Each one was triggered by something different. Positions, ideas, words, images, words and more words, planted inside my brain like a garden in spring.

There was talk of him taking me from behind, my hands on my ass, spreading, while he held my wrists. That image in and of itself has me wet just thinking about it. I've always loved the idea of that position. I came to the sound of his voice describing that.

He described us on our sides, he's behind me, I have one leg up set on the back of the couch maybe, maybe he's holding it. I can just picture him sliding in slow, my fingers working my clit, and he pulls my face over my shoulder and kisses me deep. Tongues slipping. Kissing deep like that during sex is hot, it could get me off when done at the right time.

I also came as he described how he'd cum all over me, drenching my ass, my lower back. We have a bucket list of where he should cum on me again this trip. I want him to cum on my face, all over my glasses too. I'm definitely going to have him fuck my face for that though.

When he finally got his cock out for me, I'm always gasping when I see it. It's like I haven't seen it in years or something. When he finally got his cock out for me, his verbal capabilities drop and I try to pick mine up. I generally start slowly, going back through one of the scenarios he described, re-describing the scene, from my point of view. I eventually end up getting myself off with him though and my verbal capabilities are reduced and we whisper naughty things back and forth. It's somewhat incoherent though but it's hot and it gets me off as well as him. He came loads, and when I say loads, usually it's nothing like this. This was an incredible amount, he would have drenched me, completely. This brought me back memories of our first fuck, the first time he came on me was this crazy amount, I was wet from head to toe. That tipped me over the edge again and I came with him.

Skinny Rant

I stumbled on this video today and it hit some chords. I'm not a cam model, though I have thought about it, the issues she talks about, especially regarding her weight and what people say to her about it really stood out. If I go out in public, especially in restaurants I get comments from people. It's pretty much a daily occurrence. I get it from the people I work with, friends, people I see on a daily basis that I am acquainted with, and total strangers. Just two weeks ago I went to a restaurant and the woman sitting at the table behind me patted me on the back halfway through my meal as she was getting up to leave and said "eat, eat, it's good for you".

Ok, so I live in a country where food is probably one of the most important topics but seriously, I'm starting to get tired of it. Body size really shouldn't be anyone's concern but my own. Thankyouverymuch.

*end of rant*

Temporary decadence

Lights low and voices lower on a thursday night cam date. There's something special about not getting any and then suddenly getting too much in one go. It's decadent and overwhelming yet so temporary and I know it will probably be a while before I get more.

We talked a little about our trip, mostly where to meet and how to organize things. Practical stuff. But then we dove into it. It was hot, I got naked fairly fast, stripped out of my shorts and tank top, down to my panties, and was soon out of those too.

We rarely know how to start so we just start. I start playing, he starts talking, we bring up memories of things we've done, and things we should do. We talk about the things we love doing most. Where he'll fill me, how hard, how slow or fast, how deep... mmm especially how deep. I admit how much I love sucking his cock, and love the taste of his pre-cum. I tell him how deep I want his cock.

Mostly he talks though, I don't really have verbal capabilities when I'm getting myself off or getting fucked for that matter. He tells me how he'd fuck me and then make me suck him off. Tasting myself on him and back and forth and back again. Filling my mouth with every inch I can handle and then just a little more to make me gag. He describes how he'd take me from behind, slap my ass, and pull my hair. I love the fact that so many memories come to mind when he describes things. They are tangible realities that all meld together into one fantasy. Everything we've ever done together becomes part of a new fantasy.

I've realized that to be able to get off, the fantasies have to be based in reality, they have to be something I've had a taste of before, at least to some extent. Totally new and foreign sensations are difficult for me to get aroused over. That's part of the reason his descriptions get me so hot. They are completely based in reality with hints of novelty which keep them exciting.
I'd never get bored of it. I crave it from him.

My orgasms were a domino effect. He asked me which one was best but I couldn't answer. It's hard to remember them I said. The first was clear. The second and third were almost one, as I was finishing the second, he told me not to stop and the third one hit, but it was like the wave died down and picked up again. The last was out of exhaustion. It was different from the others.

I was dripping by the end, there was sweat running down my tummy and back, my hair was sticking to my neck and face. I was flushed red in the cheeks and lips. I looked like I'd run a marathon.  I collapsed on the bed, catching my breath.

The evening didn't end there though. I thought it would. I asked him if he wanted a turn, but he said no only to go back on his decision and get his cock out not 10 minutes later. Watching him wank is like dangling a carrot in front of a rabbit. I lunge and salivate and I swear I can taste him. When I see his cock I automatically think of getting my lips around it. Maybe it's unusual, I don't automatically think of fucking, I think of sucking. I crave the taste of him so bad that it's the first thing and most prominent fantasy when I see his cock. Whether it's me sucking him, or him fucking my mouth, either way I want to taste him. I wish my pussy had taste buds. That way I could have the best of both worlds.