Jen: Let's say that you have an ice cream sundae right in front of you and you have no spoon. Now, it's a hundred degrees out and you're starving. Now, do you lick the ice cream or do you bite right in?
Dawson: Bite right in.
Jen: Too fast. See, first you have to watch the sundae, admire the sundae, then, just before it's about to drip, you let your lips lick around the exterior, savoring every inch. You want that sundae to last a long time... ...but not too long, because then the sundae ends up all over the table instead of in your mouth. But Dawson, if you remember one thing, let it be this...If you don't get the whipped cream all over your face, you're not doing it right. You see what I'm saying?
Having sex with a woman should be like eating ice-cream. Ok so this quote wasn't specifically about sex, it was about meeting a girl, getting to know her, kissing. But like with life in general it's fractal; it can apply to all aspects of a relationship.
It was from Dawson's Creek if you hadn't recognized the names. I loved this analogy. It was perfect and it stuck with me forever. It's the epitome of what women want.
There are times when a woman just wants to be ravished, taken almost violently and overpowered. That doesn't mean that you can't take your time with her too. That attention is important. It creates atmosphere and tension. It makes a woman cum harder. The build up is slower but it's stronger.
Occasionally you need to just observe, don't rip her clothes off all at once. Look at her, take some distance, watch her. Tie her hands behind her back and then move around her. Remove one thing at a time, barely grazing with your fingers. Kisses, sure, but not too many, not too long. Mix pleasure and pain, ripping/cutting clothes contrasted with slipping them slowly off. Caresses vs spanking or a lover's slap on the face. Naughty words compared to nice ones: she's a gorgeous little slut.
Tease and touch but then stop, dip in and out again, keep your distance. Don't let her control you, you control her. Let her have parts of you but only briefly. Fingers in her mouth, pussy and even ass possibly at the same time even, but then take those things away. Make her suck your cock on her knees but only temporarily, then deny her. Are you strong enough for that? Keep her wanting, she'll be begging you for more.
Just be careful, it's easy to over do the distance and she'll lose interest, it'll get boring. You need to gage how excited she gets, don't let her calm down. You'll understand from her breathing, from her pulse, her moans her eyes as she watches you move.
You need to understand when it's time to let go of the game. When it's time to give in completely. When you should be constant and not stop, if that's what you want. Do you want her to cum or do you want her to linger in limbo? The risk of limbo is that she goes beyond her limit and your work was wasted. You'd have to practically start all over. It depends on the woman, some woman love limbo, being constantly on edge. Others prefer going over the edge because they'll just want more after anyhow.
Me, personally, I go for either. I can linger in limbo for a day or even two. If you make me cum, I'll just be right back at you again in no time anyhow. Either way, boys, you win.