Monday, November 30, 2009

Is it you or me?

So what do you do when your partner initiates sex in a way that you often find annoying?

I didn't use to mind the whole way he initiated sex. Recently though it has started to get on my nerves. Ok it's not exactly recent, it's been at least a year.

I never really paid much attention to it at first. I must have been too busy being horny to notice, or maybe things have actually changed.

The ritual goes like this: I'm in bed, or on the couch, relaxing doing nothing specific, perhaps I'm watching TV or sleeping even (let's say his timing is pretty good). He'll snuggle up and make a kind of squeaky noise and rub against my leg. He'll slide his hand down my jeans or pyjama bottoms. Then he'll dry hump my leg and try to work me up.

It doesn't work.
It almost turns me off.
I probably sound like a whiner but I really can't figure it out if it's just me or if it's just plain boring. Maybe I should be trying harder. Often I end up taking control of the situation and jumping on top of him... But I can't rightly do that every single time can I?
Plus if the whole dry humping turns me off, I don't often feel like jumping on top.
I feel like he needs to get some new moves in. Surprise me. Wine and dine me. Grab me while I'm doing something active, while I least expect it. Try kissing my neck or ear or something. Even a kiss on the mouth works. Maybe even talk me into it, whisper something naughty in my ear.

I know. I sound like a horrible girlfriend. I won't be offended if everyone just tells me to get a life and try harder to enjoy it.

He mentioned that it seemed I enjoyed sex more when I initiated it. It's probably true. I probably like it more because I turn myself on.


ebony panther said...

The dry hump approach is never a good one. Cocker spaniels do that. Men never should.

Cande said...

Ebony: haha, you're right Cocker spaniels do that! lol Maybe I should mention that to him. ;)

Anonymous said...

By all means mention it to him.. tell him you want him to get you excited, not just indicate readiness on his part. You are turning into an old married couple! Try pinching his nipples lightly while you tell him and make it clear you are trying to give him ideas...
Have fun on your trip. We will miss you and your sexiness.

Cande said...

Thanks Rick!! Good advice. I'll mention it to him. I've decided. I just don't want to offend him :)
Thanks for missing me. I'll try to organize some scheduled posts so that I'm not too missed!

Anonymous said...

Yes, same old, same old does not work with sex. Married couples do it, but that's why they turn to lovers. And the cocker spaniel line should cure him of ever trying that approach again!

Cande said...

haha, You don't think that would be harsh to tell him? hmmmm... I might try talking to him about it. But I'm not sure I'll tell him he sounds like a Cocker Spaniel.... Or maybe I will and just laugh about it hoping he won't get offended.

Leonhart said...

I admit that I've been guilty of a humping initiation. Usually when mega-horny, and Wife is beside me, and I start groping and pushing in on her. Even when I am doing it I know it's not sexy and looks desperate.

Usually it's because I AM desperate.

Still, at least I am aware of it - and do try to make sure that I mix it up with better angles of approach. Massages are usually a good one for me.