Thanks for all the lovely comments, concern and advice. It definitely feels nice to hear such positive and heartfelt things from readers.
Unfortunately I have not had much progress in this whole thing. I've made many more calls and got somewhat frustrating answers.
Most of the doctors I have talked to told me I need histology reports on either my mother or my uncle or both to be able to get anywhere with an oncologist.
I made a few calls and there is N.American red tape around my mother's medical records. I can't access them unless I'm being treated by a national hospital or institute, in which case, even then it would be complicated. This is what the national health system told me, they also told me I might have a better chance if I talked to my mother's GP, especially if she is still practising. She is, except when I talked to her assistant it turns out my mother's records, from 10 years ago, are not in the 'system'. They are paper records and are therefore in storage somewhere, they have to be dug out. Her old GP will be in today and hopefully I'll have an answer on whether or not that will be possible.
I don't want to have to ask my uncle, who isn't mentally stable, to authorize to send his medical records to me.
As per medical care here, I found an institute a fair ways away which is specialized in this type of thing, but I'm pretty sure there are alternatives here. My doctor doesn't seem to want to look into what testing I need to do or whether it's possible to get it done here. It looks like I may have to do a long trip to get the information I want.
I'm still worried. I haven't been bursting into tears at random times though so that's good. I'm just getting more and more frustrated.
I was expecting the bf to be more supportive, he's been on edge and easily annoyed instead. Maybe it's my complaining about the system here and how things are so bureaucratically bad here. He picks fights with me, we had two arguments in two days because of it. I feel like I have to constantly defend myself for complaining about how frustrating this whole thing is.
I can't see a horizon, I can't see this being simple. It seems like it should be simple but it's really not.
Even on the Oncology institute site here the outline of tests seems rather straightforward, but to be able to do them I need a doctor to prescribe them and none of the doctors will prescribe them if I don't have my mother's medical records.
It's a Catch 22.