Today is not a good day. I am overwhelmed with frustration, anger, anxiety, hatred, sadness, desperation and helplessness. There are too many negative and complicated things going on and as usual, all at the same time.
I feel like telling the world to FUCK OFF and I feel like crawling under the sheets and curling up in the foetal position and staying there until the world decides to fix things.
Remember this post? Well she tried suicide again. This time though she's calling out for me. She's insisting I come to see her in the psyche ward. She called her mother frantically, desperate to see me. Her mother in tears on the phone to me begging me to help her.
The bf is barely taking an interest so to speak. I understand his distance, I accept it, and I almost agree with it, but at the same time I'm left stuck in the middle. He has no comforting words for me after I've had to see her in piteous conditions numerous times and that bothers me. I feel like slapping him into reason. I feel like forcing him to deal with the emotions. I can barely talk to him about it. He doesn't want to listen. I'm just so angry with everyone. Irrational, I'm sure... but it's the only emotion that keeps me sane right now. All the men in the family, the bf, the girl's father, their other brother are so fucking incapable with their emotions its incredible. I'd like to kick them all in the nuts and tell them to get their fucking acts together.