Saturday, June 20, 2009


I have decided. I'm absolutely positive about this. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

A couple has to love each other equally to be able to have a lasting relationship that is worth anything.

I've realized that more than 90% of my long lasting relationships (which aren't many) haven't been totally balanced. There is usually one person involved who is "more in love" than the other. Sometimes it's me, sometimes it's him.

I'm coming to realize that a true "soul mate" is someone you love unconditionally and who loves you unconditionally. I also know that it is a pretty rare thing to find.

To be honest. I don't know what I have now. I'm guessing that there's a kind of equality because it has lasted so long. I think it may just be out of habit or we're just used to each other. There's love but it's not that passionate unconditional love.

A psychologist once told me that "the man you marry isn't always the one you love passionately". That just sounds sad to me.


Aritza, Goddess of .. said...

Sometimes you love each other almost equally .. or so close to being equal that you don't know which one loves the other the most. It's rare but it happens. I don't think it can ever be totally the same but it can be pretty damn good ! I would marry out of passion but I guess that is maybe what causes many divorces too.. so sad.

Cande said...

I can only hope that equality and balance were possible. As for passion, in complete honesty, it's missing in my relationship, and I often feel like I need to find it elsewhere.

phallatio said...

That psychologist needs to get his money back on his degree! If you don't passionately love someone, why marry them?

Cande said...

Phallatio. Thanks for your comments! And yes, I have no idea why someone would sustain that fact. doesn't quite sound right does it?