Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Office Guy is a Twat

Oh man. What a stupid mistake that was.

The guy's a bit of a jerk. I know it sounds harsh.... I barely know the guy.

So, those of you who missed it, I left him my email Sunday night. Monday morning at 9:30 I get an email stating name, age and saying that he knew who'd put the email there.

Things seemed relatively normal, though he did mention right away that he was strange. I mentioned right away that I wasn't single.

Luckily I was careful and used a different email than the one connected to this blog but the first thing he did was look up my email handle and found my Instagram account and told me he'd seen my pictures... who does that? who stalks you and then tells you? Plus I was paranoid he'd found the blog... ok, so it wasn't the greatest start.... I mean honestly, I might look you up, but I don't normally go and tell you I've done it.

It's hard to describe the back and forth of these emails, it went for the entire day of Monday and part of Tuesday mostly describing ourselves in terms of who we are and what we like.

This guy likes sports, traveling, he's single, he lives with his dad (he's 35... bad sign) in the country, he says he doesn't have many real friends (I think I know why). He says he has always wanted to open a country house for tourists as a B&B but "none of his ex girlfriends supported him with the idea".... he also has 9 rifles and 3 handguns (!?!?!)......... he likes to hunt. He even joked saying if he ever got disgruntled he could blow everyone up USA style... yeah... Ha Ha funny.... I'm laughing on the inside buddy.

He immediately asked me for naked pictures and has made jokes about starting his B&B breakfast with me and even marrying me. When I told him that I wasn't planning on leaving the boyfriend just yet he got kind of pissy and wanted to end the conversations. I was actually happy to, but then he came back saying that all he really wanted was to meet me in person and that he hadn't made "who knows what plans" about me n' him in his head.

I told him that it would be difficult to meet but that I might be able to manage something at some point but that I'm shy and I need time to process things.

His response?  "Don't worry about being shy, as soon as you say hi I'll stick my tongue in your mouth and that'll cure your shyness". It was followed by a smiley face. What makes it worse is that the stupid emoticons he uses look evil.
That's the one right there... evil looking after a sentence like that...

So now I'm kinda stuck. I'll probably have to meet the guy in person, but I'm trying to figure out how to do it in a public place like a cafe so that he can't stick his tongue down my throat. Maybe I can procrastinate enough and he'll let go of the idea.

Maybe I can piss him off and not meet him... hmmm

Problem is if I piss him off and it goes wrong, it could go really wrong and he could be knocking on my door or something. He works in front of my building. He more or less knows where I live.

I'll just have to play things out until they fizzle, which hopefully will happen sooner than later...

In other unfortunate news the apartment has definitively fallen through. I got a really nice email from the owner who I'd left a note for in his mailbox asking him to contact me. I wanted to make sure the news was true. He was super apologetic and said that if anything at all changed he'd let me know, but that it likely wouldn't happen.
The agency was equally nice and said that she was already in touch with other agencies that they work with to see if there's anything else that might suit my needs.

To be honest the whole thing has upset me a fair amount. I cried when I received the two emails and even now when I write this it gets me to the verge of tears. I was so close. It's the frustration that really gets me emotionally. Plus my mind does things it shouldn't do, like think, "what if I'd said yes right away", "what if I'd paid immediately, as soon as I'd seen it"... all this wouldn't have happened.

Back to the drawing board.






9 comments:

Tom said...

Why on earth would you want to meet this creep in person? Stay away, stay far away!

Cande said...

Hahah yeah I probably should... It's just a matter of how. but I'll figure it out.

Max said...

What Tom said.

Good luck!

cammies on the floor said...

What Tom said. You are not obligated to meet this person, just explain that you don't wish to.

Advizor54 said...

I went back and looked at one of the earlier posts about his guy and you were so sweet in describing a possible meeting. Now that you know the reality, it's so different. We get our hopes up and then reality strikes. It's kind of like the apartment, you get your hopes up and then it feels even worse when it doesn't work out.

I agree with the others that you don't really have to meet this guy, because you don't want to get his hopes up, but you need to be careful with him too. Maybe walk buy his place holding hands with the BF, or recruit Co-Worker to play the role.

Be careful!

Johanna said...

Tell him politely that you will not be meeting him. I know it's a bit scary if there's a risk he knows your name, address etc... try to not upset him too much just in case. Been there, done that ;-) (I've accidentally used my work email on a couple of occasions... and my name is really easy to look up... fortunately most people are not stalkers) (or maybe I'm just not alluring enough for them to bother)

Oh and I'm so sorry about the apartment... what a disappointment. Hope something else (and better) turns up really soon.

rachel-xx said...

You already know what to do w the "twat" - lose him . . . quickly. Now, about that apartment - I'm sorry. I can not imagine how depressing it must feel. I'm depressed and it wasn't even my apartment. I did daydream about maybe visiting you in your new apartment. Maybe only wishful thinking . . . but great things can come from wishes. And I would promise not to put my tongue down your throat - umm, not unless you asked me too. :) (I hope I'm not offending you by trying to be a little light).

Cande said...

For now I'm just going to let him sit and let things settle. The first day and a half were too intense full or emails. I gave him too much attention. I'm backing off and ignoring some of his emails for now. Hoping he'll get the idea.

If he insists on meeting I'll let him down painlessly.

Tom said...

Just say your boyfriend is the really jealous type and he just got back from his tour in Afghanistan. ;)