Saturday, July 17, 2010


The patterns repeat themselves. I'm guessing it has something to do with the fibonacci sequence, but I can't be sure.

-One pattern is my arguments with bf: We've been having the same conversations for 12 years. How much longer is it possible to have the same conversation?
P.S. We finally hashed things out last night and are no longer in the cold shoulder phase.

-Another pattern is Rob: Once he gets off with me he stays away for a good long while. He hasn't answered any of my texts recently (perhaps a total of three). I've actually been looking into flights for August again... (yeah it's expensive for ryanair, but it's still within my budget range... tempting). I asked him what he thought, but there was no answer.

**post script note this afternoon. The pattern was broken... he texted me today. :)**

-Then there's my chatroulette pattern: I keep going back. It's too easy. I have started avoiding asking ages anymore, if they look old enough they are. No questions on either side usually. I've had a few interesting encounters. My most memorable was with a couple. She was sucking him off, and I guess they wanted an audience. Once he came in her mouth, he came down to the keyboard and thanked me. It was nice to just watch. I found another couple yesterday afternoon while bf was at the beach. It was a huge turn on, she had great tits, he was a bit overweight, but he was kneeling over her chest, cock between her tits and she was licking the tip of his cock as he thrust slowly. She nexted me... she looked at the screen at one point... who knows... maybe they wanted a man.
Yesterday I actually opted for a full face approach to Chatroulette, with large sunglasses to hide my eyes. It's funny how people just sit there waiting, staring at me, not talking. I'm not sure why. With so many fake chicks on there, I wonder if they think I'm a video. I remember on Camfrog that was a popular belief.


Anonymous said...

they certainly couldn't have mistaken you for anything even remotely resembling fat.

Diner Nighthawk said...

Actually, there is a lot of pre-recorded girls on Chatroulette, and I'll bet most guys would find it hard to believe they'd meet a kinky girl that looks like you online. Still, it strikes me a easier and quicker to start a conversation and watch for hand movements while she responds than to sit there like a creep waiting to see if it's a video that's going to loop back on itself.

Advizor said...

Patterns repeat because it is easier to continue than to change course. Newton's Laws of Motion apply to more than just meteors It is easier to stay in the pattern that to invest the energy and take the risk to change things The BF discussion has been going on for years, so why not change it? What prevents you from saying "Not this time!" This time the conversation will be different, I will say what is really in my heart, as scary at that is to me, and to us. You (BF) have to listen in a new way, you have to listen at a deeper level, and yes, I will do the dishes more often.

As for Rob, you have to decide if his hot/cold routine is worth the risk, and if he will be hot at the right time, or get cold, as in cold feet sometime between your takeoff and landing in his very real England.

As for ChatRoulette, don't we all have a pattern on the Internet, a "go to" site that intrigues us enough to make us keep coming back? But, if the anonymity is not longer thrilling enough, and you've gone to showing your face, what pattern are you trying to break, the monotony at home? The search for the next new thing?

Patterns give us stability, but can also be prisons; you have to decide how much courage you have to break them.

Sheen V said...

"Choose the alternative that breaks the pattern" was a mantra that a friend of mine lives by.