The desperation takes over sometimes. I feel like I'm wasting my youth. I mean, Fuck, I look good, and I can't even get a dress on for any reason?
I can't get a nice evening out with bf, I can't even suggest we go to dinner, I can't suggest we go out to get ice-cream, I can't suggest going to a concert or out for a drink for a snack, for breakfast out, to a movie, I can't suggest doing anything without him saying... "no, we've got that at home", "we can do that at home", "it's expensive", "nooo, I'll cook at home"... and so on.
I can't even offer to pay for it myself knowing he has less work at the moment.
The only reasons I can find to put on a nice dress is to go to a concert with my gay 50 yr old friend so that people stare at us as if I'm a call girl.
And he doesn't get it. I've tried talking to him about it.