Monday, August 16, 2010

Italy and the South

There are a few things I wouldn't mind getting off my chest. One is the mentality here. Now I know it's male oriented, mothers look after their sons until they're in their 50s or until they get married. But here I am with bf at his mother's house and we take showers, we put our towels out to dry, along with our bathing suits and such after being at the beach. The morning after, the woman (mom) takes EVERYTHING off the line EXCEPT my stuff... now what's up with that? I don't get it. Why would you NOT take everything off and just leave it at that? Now at my house, if they've put something out to dry, I bring it in. I don't just leave it out there just because it's not mine.
Hunh... anyhow...

Then there's the fact that everyone here is HUGE... ok so maybe not HUGE but all the women here are overweight. Everyone except BF's sister. She's super thin, thinner than me. And I'm pretty darned thin. But all of the neighbours keep asking BF's mother if I eat. I mean what's it to them if I eat or not? This small, no I correct myself, "TINY town mentality" is killer. I could never live here. Everyone talks about everyone else. The rumours that run around here are insane. I could tell so many stories about the rumours in these towns. The town I live in is small enough, being here is 100 times worse.

All of the people who used to live here immigrated outside of Italy, mostly to Germany or France. Some emigrated north, but everyone moved for work. There was nothing but fishing or olive farming to do here. So they moved. Bf was one of them. But why couldn't they have moved to Germany or France? I wouldn't be in the situation that I am. I'd probably have a house of my own by now and a decent paying job. (If I'd met bf that is). Ahh I'm just whining and being difficult, but these things do run through my mind.

In any case, while here I've thought of moving back to Canada and taking bf with me to see if he'd survive the culture shock as well as I did. Mostly because I think that there are better job opportunities and better money. It's something to think about.


Eden said...

Cande, we all need to vent sometimes and what you say is ventworthy too. The 'Mama's boy' thing drives me insane! Like grown-ass men who rely on mother to cook meals, do washing or keep a roof over their head at 100 years old. I'm like WTF?! Grow up already and do it yourself. But leaving your clothes on the line is a joke. General rule of thumb is to treat everyone the same if you are a host.

Small town mentality is a killer too and a reason I've moved places. The sad thing is, when you leave and move on with your life and revisit those places, you find those people remain static.

But on a good note, at least the visit is only temporary.

Green Eyed Frenchy said...

Your thoughts made me smile, I can so much relate, frustrations! Good thing is it's only temporary! Interesting idea to try a new life in Canada, will you be able to convince the BF?

Cande said...

Eden, you totally get it! that's it they need to grow up, but it's the mother's fault for bringing them up like that too. I can't even just blame the men.

Frenchy, I'm not sure I'll manage to convince him. Perhaps if we take a trip out there next year to visit my grandmother, maybe he'll see something he likes and think about it... who knows.

Yes thank goodness it's temporary!!!

Max said...

Sending warm wishes your way.... :-)

Canada is a wonderful country. It's worth thinking about.

Anonymous said...

As a teen I was sent to boarding school, when I did return home I ran away and lived on the streets. The last thing I am is a momma's boy and I do not understand that mentality. The spinners EX is/was a momma's boy and she still complains about it.

A small town would drive me crazy. I live in a LARGE city, I like being able to go somewhere and not have anyone know me. It also makes affairs much easier.

Diner Nighthawk said...

When dealing with people, sometimes I have to remind myself that some people are so pathetic, stirring up drama with me is probably a lot more interesting than anything else going in their lives. It seems crueler to pity someone than to be mad at them anyways.