This is a difficult post... I've written it and have been sitting wondering if I should post it... It feels wrong and right all at the same time.
I'm feeling really on edge today.
I went and read a few articles about online affairs and am now feeling confused.
My guilt may be setting in.... but it doesn't feel like guilt.
Online affairs are symptoms of a deeper relationship problem (and I already knew that). If I didn't have an affair would I manage things with bf better? probably.... (and I knew that too)
Here's a quick sum of things that I read:
Online affairs make you feel like your real relationship isn't enough.
It amplifies the negative qualities of your partner.
It forces you to withhold information, and therefore be deceitful and basically create a massive gap in communication with your partner.
The list goes on, and on...
Today I am feeling frustrated... really frustrated. So frustrated I feel like cutting all contacts. But I'm sure that won't happen. They make me feel too good. I find though that I'm seriously craving more and more contact. I think I need to back away. Because when I don't get the contact I need I get frustrated and anxious, it affects my mood more than it should... I really doubt this is healthy.
I need to concentrate on other things. I will make a serious effort to do so.... avoid email, avoid sitemeter... at least I'll try... for a while.