Sunday, October 9, 2011


I have been calm, with moments of despair, but this evening or tomorrow the conversation will take place. I am hoping for tonight as I want to get it over with.
I still don't know what I will say or how I will say it. I have never had an experience like this with the language, I do not know what is tactful. I trust that my English reasoning will work though.

I feel sad, I feel ok about it, I am scared shitless, but I will go through with it.

I have realized another thing, another reason to leave. Within this relationship I have lost my strength. He makes me weak. When we travel it is the opposite, I am strong and he is weak because of the language and my experience as a traveller.
I want to be strong again.

I have been insatiable these days, getting myself off three four times a day. I'm guessing it's the stress. I wish Rob were around, sometimes I get to thinking he is the only one who can... fill the need.


ebony panther said...

I wish you much strength & satisfaction.

Max said...

Good luck! You're stronger than you think.

Michael said...

You're mind is made up ... you are ready ... it will be hard, but it's the best for both of you. Be firm, and good luck. We're all with you.


Anonymous said...

just do it, no matter what the outcome you have got your message through and you can move on.

easy for us to say as we dont have to have the conversation....